this years girl.

It was beautiful.
Quiet.
Rarely was it quiet, but today it was.

It was just me, my thoughts, a white owl-face,
and an old blue typewriter my sister found for me at a thrift sale.
And which I named Claude.

I never know what to write.
I never know what I’m supposed to write.
It may be deep or it may be the oddest thing you ever heard.

Today I was writing about the end of everything.

About holding time in my hand and watching it slip.
Watching hair grow, and feet grow, and little bodies become big bodies
and I’m just not ready for this, are you?

I hear the keys clacking,
I see my fingers flying over them and I always like how that looks.
I applaud myself on writing these words out on a real typewriter.
One named Claude.
And then I hear it.
Again.

Or rather I don’t hear it.
The house is so quiet.
I sudden-see a day in the much-too-near future
when there will be no children here.
When there will be no sippy cups under the sofa
and no kiss-prints on the windows.
No giant crayon murals on the walls,
no tiny loofah bits shredded with care into the toilet.
(happened just today folks)

And I put my foot down smash to the carpet.
I defy it all.
I defy DEFY that day.

I will not stand by and
watch myself
turn into a bored housewife,
suppressing my loneliness with PartyBingo.com
and General Hospital.

I will adopt.
I will foster.
I will fill these halls with goodness.
With magic and laughter and warmth and love and sound.
God help me.

I will.

And I snatch away a heart-promise for myself.
Like I always do when conversing with Claude;
I promise myself yet again that this is just the beginning.
This is just the toe in the Narnia door.

I said when we began to remodel this house,
that I always want it to look like children live here.
I want to pour love out like a pitcher
into a thirsty fox den.

****

“There’s nothing to writing.
All you do is sit down at a typewriter
and open a vein.”
~Walter Wellesley Smith

*****
The art prints that adorn my walls,
the locket around my neck–swinging as I move just now;
all by This Years Girl.
She creates art that defies explaining,
and says her greatest inspiration is her daughter.
She says that through her eyes?
Everything is magical.

(amen)

We pick This Years Girl because her lovely pictures stir our soul.

****************************

A giveaway!

This Years Girl is offering a complete set of prints from her shop!

Here’s how you can win:

All of the giveaways on The Lovely Guide
will be won by finding “easter eggs” throughout the site.

First entry: Go here to answer the secret question.

Additional entries: We are enjoying our debutante ball,
we’re brand new, and we’re hoping you’ll help us spread the word
about the pretty things we’re gathering for everyone.
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Be sure to return to this post and leave a comment for each task you completed!

Giveaway ends December 1st at midnight.

Good luck!